Just the Line — Words Only

Asked the apps where I went wrong. They sent results.

Sorry. No, you go. Sorry. No, really. Sorry. (At this rate we'll never get anywhere.)

I'm just another white man with a podcast.

Calendar invite. No agenda. Subject line: catch up. I am not catching anything up.

Love them. Cannot be in the same kitchen as them.

Looking for a Byzantine-style gold chain. On a budget. Yes I see how that sounds.

Angels protect. Sarcasm directs.

Bought a house. Just me. The mortgage broker handled it like a death notification.

I already work from home. You can't bring me back. I never left.

The break room is now in the parking garage. We are still calling it a break room.

All my friends are tired. We thought we'd outgrow it. We were wrong.

Throwing bottles into the sea was nicer than dating apps. The currents had standards.

Boreout: like burnout, but the cause is nothing happening. Symptoms identical. Sympathy: less.

Air travel is finally back to its normal level of awful.

First wall art I owned was a velvet blacklight poster. Things have not improved.

Bare Minimum Monday — A Practice. Effective immediately. Renewable weekly. Compulsory in spirit.

AI girlfriend saved my marriage. My wife also has one. Hers is better.

Are baggy jeans still in. I have stopped asking. Trousers will tell me when they're ready.

First baby: thirty items I had to have. Second baby: a clean towel. Third baby: vibes.

I asked the baby where its mother was. Then remembered I am the mother.

Built in Canada. Sold to Asia. Funded by France. Branded by Toulouse. We are very Canadian, somehow.

Adulting powered by hope and reheated coffee

Artificial Intelligence. Shouldn't we discover real intelligence first?